Two opposing county chairman were sharing a rare moment together. The Democratic chairman said, "I never pass up a chance to promote the party. For example, whenever I take a cab, I give the driver a sizable tip and say, 'Vote Democratic.'"
His opponent said, "I have a better scheme, and it
doesn't cost me a nickel. I don't give any tip at all. And when I leave, I also say, 'Vote Democratic.'"
A surgeon, an architect, and a politician were considering the question of whose profession was the oldest.
"I think my line of work would win this one hands down," the surgeon said. "After all, Eve was created from Adam's rib, and that sounds like surgery to me."
"Maybe," the architect said, "but before Adam, order was created out of chaos. That was architectural accomplishment."
"Sure," the politician said. "But before that, someone had to create the chaos."
A newcomer to the political scene was campaigning in the backwoods for the office of assemblyman. Outside a ramshackle house, he saw a young man milking a cow. He approached the man, ready to make his pitch for a vote. Just as he was getting started, an old man called from inside the house. "Luke, get in the house. And who is that
guy you're talking to?"
"Says he's a politician, Pop," Luke said.
"In that case, you'd better bring the cow inside with
you."
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